SEATTLE — When bad things happen, how do you talk to yourself?
What are things you say to yourself when you make a mistake?
Marc Brackett, Ph.D., is the Founder and Director of the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence and the lead developer of RULER, an evidence-based approach to social and emotional learning that has been adopted by nearly 2,000 Pre-K through high schools across the United States and in other countries.
Brackett says learning to regulate our emotions is key to emotional intelligence; and negative self talk can get in the way.
He shared three strategies for developing better and more positive self-talk:
1. Use your first name when talking to yourself about something difficult. For example, "Angela, you can get through this."
2. Remind yourself this is temporary.
3. Ask yourself what would you say to your closest friend or loved one in a similar situation.